Friday, April 24, 2015

Graduation Speech

Melissa,

So, I graduated today. There is so much I could write about it, but the scariest part, but also the most rewarding was being able to speak at convocation for the College of Physical and Mathematical Sciences. I worked hard at it, and I feel that it expresses my feelings for today very well. So here it is. Enjoy.

- Jessica

I’m a math major, so I have to ask, what does a BYU undergrad’s experience equal? For me, its 56 classes, 47 professors, 15 roommates, 10 semesters, 9 binge-watched TV shows,  4 apartments,  3 on-campus jobs, 2 major changes, and 2 grad school acceptances, all for 1 piece of paper with my name on it. This seems like a lot, so why am I excited and yet sad at the same time? Why do I jump at the chance to go somewhere new and make my own path, yet tremble at the idea of leaving my home for the past four years?
 Part of it is the feeling of accomplishment – we’ve made it! We are done and the things we have accomplished are great. Think of that test you studied all week for and somehow managed to pass. Think of the project that you were working on all semester, and it still became a mad rush to finish in the last two weeks. Think of the early morning class you could never quite make it on time to, and the afternoon class you always seemed to sleep through. Think of the class you never thought you would pass, and think of the late hours in the library or dark corners of the Talmage, Eyring, or the Benson building working towards that passing grade. All those tasks are finished and through them we have gathered a large base of knowledge and skills to bring into the next stage of our lives.
But it wasn’t just the classes that made our time at BYU great. Think of the friends you’ve made, both in class and out, that helped you with those tests and projects, or even just helped you let off some steam when the class load got too hard. Think of the professors that consistently spent office hours or even extra hours helping you understand the material or giving you advice about classes, internships, or graduate schools. Think of the roommates that might have driven you crazy with a sink consistently full of dishes, but that were also there when life got too hard. They were there for the late movie nights, the rejections, the hopes and dreams. As much as what we have accomplished these past years is something to be proud of, the people we have met, grown to love, and who have changed us are worth treasuring, thanking, and always remembering.
I’d like to share one of the best things I learned here at BYU, and it wasn’t from a certain class or one huge revelation. It was a slow change that has happened over the past four years  thanks to friends, family, and the professors I’ve met here at BYU.
Four years ago, little freshman Jessica sat down in her first college class. It was a scary 300 level religion class that she desperately wanted to take, but was terrified to because she was a little freshman. As the teacher got farther into the syllabus her heart sank. The assignments seemed too much, the writing too intense, and all the other students seem much older and sure of themselves. There was no way she could get a good grade! As soon as the class ended, Jessica raced to the library, found a computer, dropped the class, and added a Book of Mormon class instead.
Two years later, I was once again in a class where the teacher spent the whole first day going on and on about how it was going to be the hardest thing I would do in college. I was faced with a programming language I didn’t know and fellow students who not only seemed much older but were almost all male. Once again, my stomach started twisting and I started wondering if there would be anyone who wanted to work with me, if I would be able to learn python while keeping up with the assignments, and if I could handle the math proofs and computational homework. All this while that little nagging voice kept answering “you can’t do it, you CAN’T do it.”
This time, however, I stayed in the class which was my first in the Applied and Computational Math Emphasis. The next two years, as I went through the program, were the hardest things I’ve done in college. I found myself staying on campus later and later and spending more and more time in the computer lab staring at bits of code, hoping they’d fix themselves. I wrote proof after proof, until the details all started to blur in my mind and I couldn’t tell convex from concave. I filled whiteboards and whiteboards with formulas studying for tests. But with the help of friends and professors, I made it. And not only did I survive, but I excelled. I’d had enough confidence to stay in the class after that first day and when I saw that my hard work brought success that confidence grew until I’ve been able to present about my own research at conferences and apply to graduate schools I never would have dreamed of. This confidence has enabled me to explore areas to find what I’m passionate about and to create friendships better than I’ve ever had. I’ve learned that if I’m willing to do the work, I can accomplish absolutely anything.
And this knowledge is what I want to share with you today. Take the passions and interests you’ve found during your time here at BYU and pursue them! You have the skills and knowledge you need, and if you don’t you can gain them - the resources are there if you are willing to put in the work.  As much as I enjoyed the Book of Mormon class I took, I never did find time to take that religion class I ran away from four years ago and I plan on never repeating that mistake again. This fall I am heading to Duke University to start my PhD in Computational Biology and Bioinformatics and I plan on taking full advantage of the resources there in order to accomplish the most I can and best learn how to do my own original research. All of us have a bright future ahead because of the wonderful environment BYU has provided. As we face both the joy and sorrow that today brings, remember, success is ahead if you just have the confidence to work for your dreams.
Thank you, and congratulations.

Sunday, February 1, 2015

NCUWM

Melissa,

I spent last weekend in Nebraska. Why Nebraska you ask? I was there for the Nebraska Conference for Undergraduate Women in Mathematics (NCUWM) and it was fabulous!

There were plenary talks  by female professors and panels about careers in math and graduate school. There were breakout sessions about graduate school, research, math clubs, being confident, and many other things. There were undergraduate talks and posters about their research experiences and  I gave a talk about my research as did a couple of my friends.

I met women doing research in anything from graph theory to applied math, and I got to meet other undergraduates who have the same troubles about not knowing what research or careers they want to do.

I met women who had no female faculty when they went to school. I met women who were the first to be pregnant at their graduate school. I met professors doing research in mathematical biology just like I want to do. I met women from the graduate schools I am applying to. I met women excelling in life in all the ways I want to, and I met women who told me I could, too.

I know that women are just as good at math as men, but I don't think I believed that my career options were as broad or as bright as men's until now. Why? I simply hadn't seen it. There's only a couple of female math professors in my department, and I really haven't had much interaction with them. But meeting women who have built careers in math, who have balanced family and work, and who absolutely love their work and are so excited to help me build my career has been amazing. Now I have no doubt that I can accomplish whatever program or research that I set my mind to.

The conference wasn't about moaning about how men dominate everything or complaining that we aren't given the same opportunities. That didn't happen at all. It was about bringing women together and giving us the courage and confidence to pursue the careers we want.

The quote to best sum it up is this: "Men can be great mentors, but there is something powerful about seeing someone do what you want to do who looks like you." I might not have remembered it right, but Dr. Maria Klawe, the one who said it, is my new hero along with many of the other women I met this weekend. For the first time I feel like I have role models who share my dreams and face my same challenges. And for the first time I really feel like I can succeed in graduate school and beyond

 - Jessica

Monday, January 5, 2015

Jan 5, 2014: A Week of Joy

Hey everyone. Thanks for still being alive.

I've felt so many different versions of joy this week, that I don't even know where to start.

New Years Eve:

Joy is looking up from personal study and seeing snow. Yes. Snow. In Las Vegas. It lasted a total of five minutes. But I touched snow! Needless to say, I had a very hard time focusing for the rest of studies because I was hoping that it would snow again.

Saturday night:

We are teaching a family of three. M, T (14), and A (7). Their dad was a member and he died about a year ago. We don't know how active the dad was or anything. We got them as a referral from a bishop. M went to the bishop and got food and he gave her a BOM and referred her to us. A is very anti-us. Really he just wants the attention. He complains and says that our games are stupid and that we won't read, but he really likes us. We can tell. T is along those same lines. Always busy, always wants to leave, and never says he'll read or pray. But on Saturday, HE TOLD US HE READ. THREE CHAPTERS OF THE BOM. We did not see that coming. That was joy.

Monday:

You guys are alive. That's joy.

What else happened this week? A lot. We'll start with the car. But that takes some backtracking.

So wayyyyyy back in November, we had to get a smog check for our car. When we did that the guy told us that our fan was really loud and going on for a really long time and that we should get that checked. We called Elder B (who's in charge of car-ness) and he told us to just get our smog checked. So we just got our smog checked. Then a notification came up that the AC was turned off due to engine temperatures (the AC wasn't on). We were like, well, they are going to check the car soon so we don't need to worry about it. But we worried. We called Elder B a little while later and he freaked out and told us to put water in the radiator. He told us not to drive it and put water in it. We were like, how are we getting home . . .? So we found some nice guys to put water in it. They might have been a bit drunk. We're not sure. (Oh ya, this was back with Hermana S by the way.) Anyway, Elder B told us to take the car in. Down in Henderson. So we drove alllll the way down to Henderson, sat in the dealership for like four hours, for them to tell us they could not find a leak. Elder B told us to keep an eye on the car. So, fast forward to this week. We had to fill the radiator again. So, Elder B told us to take the car in again (this time close by, thank goodness!). They told us that the water pump is leaking and something else needed to be fixed that was making a mysterious clicking noise. They shuttled us home and we called them later and they told us, that IF they have the parts, we can get it back Tuesday. This was Friday. A.K.A we were going to be without a car until Tuesday. At the earliest. So guess what we did. We biked! But when our district leader saw us biking down the road, and the members found out that we were biking, they decided that that was an abomination. They took it as a personal offence. So Saturday, we borrowed the district leader's car when he had members who were driving him around, and we got a lot of rides from members. Yesterday all of our appointments were close enough to walk, so we walked around. Except for when we needed to go to the projects, then we got a ride. Today the sister training leaders are driving us around so we can go shopping and email and stuff. We haven't quite figured out what is happening tonight. The problem is that if we bike for part of the day, we either have to go ALL the way back to our apartment to drop off the bikes or leave them somewhere when a member gives us a ride. So it's really not effective to do that. So we have to figure out the perfect balance of walking, biking, and rides. It's quite complicated.

For New Years Eve we had to be in our apartments by 6 o'clock. I had plans to be super productive and organize and all this stuff, but, I was super tired. So I watched like an hour of Bible Videos and then went to bed. I took like two mini naps in there too.

I think New Years Day is my new favorite holiday. People were home because it's a holiday, but they weren't busy because they did all their celebrating the night before. It was great!

Well. I think that's all I got for right now. Please don't die in the next week. That would be greatly appreciated.

Hermana Leete





Sunday, January 4, 2015

A Scary Experience

Melissa,

To stop the suspense, I'll tell you what happened right away. Friday afternoon, Kevin, Rebecca, and I left to go back to school. We were planning on stopping at Aunt Lynn's in Boise that night, but we didn't make it since we kinda wrecked our car. Don't worry, everyone is absolutely fine. Here's what happened.

The roads were perfectly clear the whole way, even as we got up into the blue mountains. We started going downhill a bit and as we turned a right corner, there was a large patch of ice. We started fishtailing, but with the downhill Kevin couldn't slow down and get it under control fast enough and it just got worse. The back left  of the car hit the cement median, sending the back sliding harder to the right. The back of the car slid in front of us, turning us around. The cement median had stopped, but we hit the snow bank on the median with the passenger side of the car. We then rolled over into the snow and slid backwards and upside down for about 20-30 feet. No one was hurt, but we were a bit shaken up and trapped in the car since the snow was so deep. Kevin couldn't find his phone, but I had mine in my pocket so I called 911. Kevin wasn't sure if we were in the median or the other side of the street, so he turned on all the outside lights and started honking the horn, but we were safe in the median. Some nice people had stopped as soon as they saw us crash and helped dig us out. We all got out ok and got safely to the other side of the street. where Rebecca and I sat in the car of one of the people who had stopped to help. They were a nice couple heading back to OSU. He used to be an EMT so he checked us for concussions. Kevin dealt with the police and stuff.

The whole experience was terrifying, but so much went right to keep us safe.  There wasn't any front impact, so the airbags didn't go off (saving our noses) and none of the stuff from the back of the car flew forward and hit us (the car was packed to the roof!). The jam jars in the back didn't even break! There was no shattered glass to deal with. The puppy was fine even though he wasn't secured to anything. Rebecca says she was able to grab him before we rolled.  Nice people got there really quick to help.  Dad had been meaning to change the car insurance to a cheaper plan that wouldn't cover this, but forgot so we are covered. But most importantly, no one was hurt. Well, Kevin stubbed his toe and Rebecca's shoulder is a bit sore, but that is it.God was watching over us, I'm sure He was.

So after the police came and checked everything out and righted the car, we got all our valuables and important things like purses and laptops out and one of the truck drivers gave us a ride to a hotel in Pendleton. We stayed there for the night, although no one got much sleep. We just talked and tried to calm each other down. There were no car rental places open on Saturday, So mom and dad came and gave us a ride (We were only about 3 hours from home). On Saturday we got the rest of the stuff from the car. In the daylight, the car didn't look so bad from some angles. The passenger door didn't close anymore, I'm not sure if that was from the roof being dented or the door misshapen. There was a fist sized dent in the back bumper from where we hit the median, and the roof above the driver's seat had really bent in. And the glass sunroof was gone. It's a good thing the cover was closed to keep the glass out when we were stuck in the car. After we got everything out of the wrecked car, we drove to Boise where Aunt Lynn made some great soup and we all went to bed early. Then on Sunday we drove to Provo. So you're not going to get an email from mom. They're staying at a hotel overnight then driving all the way home tomorrow.

Back tracking to earlier in the week, it was pretty chill. We saw The Hobbit, the Battle of the Five Armies, which was enjoyable - although Dad is very glad it's over. New Year's eve was fun. Linnea joined us and we stayed up playing games and watched the ball drop in Times Square. The next day she came over and we had a knitting party! Later the family saw the Imitation Game. It's about Alan Turing, a mathematician who broke the German enigma machine during the WWII. The enigma machine was how the Germans encoded all their messages, so by breaking the code, historians estimate that the war ended two years earlier and saved millions of lives. Everyone liked it, the movie was beautifully done.

That's about it for the update! I hope everything is going well over there. I'm all settled in and ready for the new semester tomorrow.  This week I learned without a doubt that the Lord is watching over us. If we are follow his commandments and keeping our covenants, He will protect us when needed. He truly loves us and wants the best for us.

I also learned the importance of seat belts. They kept us in our seats while we rolled and then we were hanging by them afterward. Things would have been much worse if we hadn't been wearing seat belts. ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS WEAR A SEAT BELT. God is less likely to help out if you're an idiot who doesn't wear a seat belt.

Love you lots.

Jessica 

P.S. Here's a picture Kevin took of our car upside down in the snow. The rut in the snow in front of it is where we slid.




P.P.S On a happier note, I tried taking some selfies with Brahms in the car. Here's two that I got.  He's so cute!